"It takes a great deal of courage, to forgive and move on", how many would agree? "Obviously this is true", is what our minds say, but this is not true always. It doesn't take courage, it takes countless seconds, minutes, hours, nights of emotional agony, gasping for over-coming that painful moment. Then how can you expect me to forgive and forget? Or how would you expect me to, learn from my actions after forgetting that incident?
'PERCEPTION' , is a strong and powerful word. Now I have been told that, every individual has his/ her own perception and outlook at any event occurring, so how do you expect me to accept what you feel over what I feel, or implement an action only on the basis of someone else's experience solely?
For example : " if someone say person 'x', approached to some girl, I liked , with knowledge about my emotions", how would everyone react ?
Or another example- "getting shot down, for a proposal"?
People close to me , would suggest me to either distance myself from the friend who crossed paths with me, or forget the girl who shot me down. These two incidents do occur in everyone's life, some term it as "cheating" others term it as "betrayal". From my point of view, yes I m hurt, and it isn't the 'courage' that I need, I require time. Time to recover, time to mature.
Yes I could go leaps and bounds, be the slow knife, the knife that cuts in deep through the essential veins to take revenge but what would that make me? I would never be forgetting but with an implementation of being the slow knife, I would never even forgive. With time as I have matured I have learned to look from others perspective , listening to stories expressed by others, has the 'time' really done me good? Time has helped me forgive, made me realize during those sleepless nights- maybe if I were in Mr.X's shoes i may have done similar thing, so really could I forgive myself? If I can forgive myself why couldn't I forgive someone else? "I could forgive and move on with self-realization, self-insight! without forgetting, because if I want that to be a valuable lesson I have to remember it."
Finally how do I act? Oh yes my loved ones I know you want the best for me and I m not shooting your valuable suggestions totally out of the box, but I am not even allowing my decision to be over powered by solely your inputs. So I would forgive, but not forget, move on without any regrets and wouldn't let that incident bother me in future, that I can bet! In addition, I can't be my old self because then all the time would haven't taken me anywhere but there again, so yes changes are in order but you know why, because I m not forgetting but threshold-ding that on my learning-curve, with a success of forgiving.
"Time will always heal and find ways to reconcile things which are meant to be! For others you have already been shown the path that leads to the exit."
'PERCEPTION' , is a strong and powerful word. Now I have been told that, every individual has his/ her own perception and outlook at any event occurring, so how do you expect me to accept what you feel over what I feel, or implement an action only on the basis of someone else's experience solely?
For example : " if someone say person 'x', approached to some girl, I liked , with knowledge about my emotions", how would everyone react ?
Or another example- "getting shot down, for a proposal"?
People close to me , would suggest me to either distance myself from the friend who crossed paths with me, or forget the girl who shot me down. These two incidents do occur in everyone's life, some term it as "cheating" others term it as "betrayal". From my point of view, yes I m hurt, and it isn't the 'courage' that I need, I require time. Time to recover, time to mature.
Yes I could go leaps and bounds, be the slow knife, the knife that cuts in deep through the essential veins to take revenge but what would that make me? I would never be forgetting but with an implementation of being the slow knife, I would never even forgive. With time as I have matured I have learned to look from others perspective , listening to stories expressed by others, has the 'time' really done me good? Time has helped me forgive, made me realize during those sleepless nights- maybe if I were in Mr.X's shoes i may have done similar thing, so really could I forgive myself? If I can forgive myself why couldn't I forgive someone else? "I could forgive and move on with self-realization, self-insight! without forgetting, because if I want that to be a valuable lesson I have to remember it."
Finally how do I act? Oh yes my loved ones I know you want the best for me and I m not shooting your valuable suggestions totally out of the box, but I am not even allowing my decision to be over powered by solely your inputs. So I would forgive, but not forget, move on without any regrets and wouldn't let that incident bother me in future, that I can bet! In addition, I can't be my old self because then all the time would haven't taken me anywhere but there again, so yes changes are in order but you know why, because I m not forgetting but threshold-ding that on my learning-curve, with a success of forgiving.
"Time will always heal and find ways to reconcile things which are meant to be! For others you have already been shown the path that leads to the exit."
Its an amazing article! Understanding perception and the power of time.
ReplyDeleteThank you Ms Yashaushwani Bakshi, valuable lessons learnt from you also.
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